Every Good Girl Read online

  EVERY

  GOOD GIRL

  Judy Astley

  Contents

  Cover

  Title

  Copyright

  About the Author

  Also by Judy Astley

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  This eBook is copyright material and must not be copied, reproduced, transferred, distributed, leased, licensed or publicly performed or used in any way except as specifically permitted in writing by the publishers, as allowed under the terms and conditions under which it was purchased or as strictly permitted by applicable copyright law. Any unauthorised distribution or use of this text may be a direct infringement of the author’s and publisher’s rights and those responsible may be liable in law accordingly.

  Version 1.0

  Epub ISBN 9781409057727

  www.randomhouse.co.uk

  EVERY GOOD GIRL

  A BLACK SWAN BOOK : 0552997668

  9780552997669

  First publication in Great Britain

  PRINTING HISTORY

  Black Swan edition published 1998

  5 7 9 10 8 6 4

  Copyright © Judy Astley 1998

  The right of Judy Astley to be identified as author of this work has been asserted in accordance with sections 77 and 78 of the Copyright Designs and Patents Act 1988.

  All the characters in this book are fictitious, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

  Condition of Sale

  This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, re-sold, hired out or otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

  Black Swan Books are published by Transworld Publishers Ltd,

  61–63 Uxbridge Road, London W5 5SA,

  a division of The Random House Group Ltd,

  in Australia by Random House Australia (Pty) Ltd,

  20 Alfred Street, Milsons Point, Sydney, NSW 2061, Australia,

  in New Zealand by Random House New Zealand Ltd,

  18 Poland Road, Glenfield, Auckland 10, New Zealand

  and in South Africa by Random House (Pty) Ltd,

  Isle of Houghton, Corner of Boundary Road & Carse O’Gowrie,

  Houghton 2198, South Africa.

  Judy Astley was frequently told off for daydreaming at her drearily traditional school but has found it to be the ideal training for becoming a writer. There were several false starts to her career: secretary at an all-male Oxford college (sacked for undisclosable reasons), at an airline (decided, after a crash and a hijacking, that she was safer elsewhere) and as a dress designer (quit before anyone noticed she was adapting Vogue patterns). She spent some years as a parent and as a painter before sensing that the day was approaching when she’d have to go out and get a Proper Job. With a nagging certainty that she was temperamentally unemployable, and desperate to avoid office coffee, having to wear tights every day and missing out on sunny days on Cornish beaches with her daughters, she wrote her first novel, Just for the Summer. She has now had eight novels published by Black Swan.

  www.booksattransworld.co.uk

  Also by Judy Astley

  JUST FOR THE SUMMER

  PLEASANT VICES

  SEVEN FOR A SECRET

  MUDDY WATERS

  THE RIGHT THING

  EXCESS BAGGAGE

  NO PLACE FOR A MAN

  and published by Black Swan

  Chapter One

  ‘Worm tablet. Don’t forget the worm tablet.’

  Monica Dyson, of meddlesome habit, stood at the kitchen doorway watching, ready to pounce with advice and criticism as her son decanted cat food from tin to bowl. One hand rested on the door handle for support, but the other, the one with all the silver bracelets, flicked and fluttered as if she was miming what her son’s actions should be. Her tongue clicked little noises of impatience and she clung to the door handle to stop herself flying across the room and wresting the fork from his awkward, too-big fingers to dice the cat’s supper herself. He was just mashing it about uselessly, in that hopeless way boys did, pulping it to a sodden thick mass instead of slicing it neatly crisscrossed to bite-sized shards the way she would have done it. Boys needed to be given jobs to do around the house, it made them feel important. Monica believed that men who weren’t allowed to feel important made trouble for everyone, just to get themselves noticed. Her son-in-law for one. They had it in their hormones – something prehistoric about being allowed to think they were in charge of things. Any little thing would do, she’d come to realize over the years, just carrying a moderately heavy bag or being thanked for sweeping up a few leaves from the path. There wasn’t a woman born who really couldn’t change a plug.

  ‘And cut it small otherwise she leaves half of it. Her teeth aren’t what they were.’ Whose are? she thought to herself.

  Monica’s son Graham smiled down at the grey striped cat which purred and narrowed its sly orange eyes at him. He ignored his mother and concentrated on what he was doing. If he took his eyes off the cat she’d head-butt the bowl out of his hand and onto the black and white tiled floor and that would mean mess and trouble. He’d remembered the worm tablet (crushed and mixed in), he’d forked the food into a manageable mush and he knew there wouldn’t be anything left in just ten minutes. The food was the cat’s favourite – a foul-smelling mackerel mixture.

  ‘It’s all done, Mother, I did remember,’ he told Monica patiently. He put the dish on the kitchen floor and the cat immediately started gobbling greedily at the food, still purring. She didn’t care how neatly it was presented, she’d have wolfed it down straight from the tin like a greedy teenager home from a late night, foraging in the cupboard for spaghetti hoops.

  ‘You’ll choke,’ he warned it, stroking the animal’s ears.

  ‘Don’t fuss her while she’s eating!’ Monica scolded, reaching forward and smacking his wrist away from the cat. ‘She’ll only follow you for more attention and leave it all! She’s got to get that tablet down. You’d know why if you’d seen what I saw in her litter tray this morning.’

  Graham scowled but obediently left the cat to eat in peace, grumpily throwing the empty tin at the kitchen bin and missing. Flecks of processed mackerel scattered over the floor tiles and Monica gave an exaggerated gasp. ‘Oh you are such a clumsy boy! Now look what you’ve done! Go and get a cloth, go on, and clear it up.’

  Graham crouched at the under-sink cupboard, rooting through for a J-cloth and the Flash. He could hear his mother muttering furiously to herself as she went back to the TV in the sitting room. The sofa squeaked as she sat down heavily. ‘Hopeless boy,’ he heard her say. He smiled sadly to himself as he carefully swabbed down the floor. The ‘boy’ was thirty-nine.

  The model’s smile was sheer come-and-get-it, unsuitably so from among the virginal wisps of a white wedding veil. Barely deigning to touch the arm of her ‘groom’ as if to emphasize his lowly status as mere scenery, she strolled languidly along the shopping-mall catwalk, avoiding the meeting of eyes, the unprofessional temptation to be distracted from what she
was doing. The simple dress clung to the full length of her body, with a curved split from ankle to thigh from which glimpses of one slim pale leg could be seen. It was the kind of dress that made it clear what marriage was really for.

  Behind her, tiny and careful, watching the floor for where their satin-shod feet should be going, trailed a parade of six ‘bridesmaids’, in shades of pink and lilac, all net and silk roses, with baskets of daisies swaying precariously from their chubby fingers. The audience were bag-laden and weary but lingered to catch the end of the fashion show, careless of the approaching rush hour and the mounting car park charges. They sighed collectively at such a sight of pure prettiness and as the sleek couple reached the end of the catwalk, there was a spontaneous burst of applause. But when the model stopped to turn and pose and smile, the little train behind her continued walking, just as they had been told. No-one in the flustered, chaotic changing room had said anything about stopping. The girl felt them colliding together behind her and her paid-to-be-radiant smile faltered as they crashed into her and shoved her to a silky tangle three feet below the podium. There was an undignified scuffling of fabric, the rasp of ripping lace, and the pounding feet of the fleeing ‘groom’.

  ‘Mu-mmy!’ wailed the model, clutching her tumbled veil and pushing her dress down to cover her mortifyingly exposed underwear. ‘Mum-my!’ she roared, face scarlet and tears fast gathering. Lucy’s mother Nina continued calmly folding clothes in the dressing area and assumed that she would be summoned if her daughter was truly hurt. If she wasn’t, there was no point making a fuss – little mishaps like this would merely help Lucy on the stony road to independence. They’d laugh about it together later.

  ‘Poor little thing. Where is her mum?’ sympathized an onlooker, reaching across to help her back up onto the podium. ‘Never mind dear, it was just an accident.’ The reassurance attempt failed. The model gathered her crumpled skirt together, pushed her furious self past the sobbing remains of her baby retinue and fled. She was, after all, only ten years old.

  Chapter Two

  Nina Malone stood in front of her mirror and wished the bathroom lights weren’t quite so ruthless. She was sure that under something less honest her face wouldn’t look anything like as lived-in. She’d been a still-optimistic thirty-five when she and Joe had opted for the high-tech low-voltage lighting makeover. ‘Then when you’re old and your eyes have gone, you won’t get lipstick all over your chin,’ he’d joked at the time. At thirty-five, you were still a year or two from the end of thinking that was funny. Six years on, bloody Joe was no longer around to see (or care) where she smeared her make-up. She could be squinting into a powder-speckled hand mirror, or the reflection from the switched-off TV for all he knew.

  ‘Oh what’s the point?’ she sighed, carelessly whisking blusher over her cheekbones. She placed her fingers each side of her jaw and eased the tiny amount of slack skin upwards. The years since the lights were installed disappeared, or at least she assumed they did, because that’s what everyone who was slyly checking out the potential results of cosmetic surgery said. ‘You’ve still got good bones, I’ll say that for you,’ her mother had told her a year or two ago. Monica had said it as if that was the only positive comment she was prepared to make, and then only grudgingly. Nina smiled at herself and forgave the brutal lights, because now they beamed down on the perfect gleaming teeth which had, many years before, got her the Pearl Girl toothpaste job, placing her grinning mouth on hoardings and magazine pages all over the country. ‘So, you’re a gob-model’ had been Joe’s bizarre first words to her.

  ‘OK, so which earrings?’ Nina turned and asked the man perched on the edge of the bath, watching her.

  ‘Well it’s only lunch,’ Henry reminded Nina.

  ‘I know. And it’s only Joe,’ she agreed. ‘The pearl studs or the gold semi-quavers? What do you think?’

  Henry inspected Nina by way of the mirror. He grinned at her, his weatherbeaten face corrugating. With the general unfairness of the ageing of the sexes, the light which was merciless to women made Henry look adventurous and interesting. He looked like an explorer, just back from discovering a new antipodean reptile. ‘Huge great dangling diamond chandelier numbers, that would be my choice. Show the bastard that even without him – no, especially without him – you have life.’

  Nina giggled. ‘Oh Henry. You’re completely useless. Joe knows quite well I’m perfectly happy, I don’t have to prove anything. The semi-quavers, I think.’

  She pinned them to her ears and rifled through her make-up bag for the right lipstick. Was the blue silk suit a bit much, she then wondered. It was new: Joe would comment, if only to find out how much it had cost. It was the kind of thing he thought he ought to know, now he was handing over alimony. He probably had a gaggle of friends who told him what to look out for in terms of overspending ex-wives, warning him she’d blow all the children’s school lunch money in Harvey Nichols and leave them to forage on curled-up bread crusts and age-softened apples. She didn’t want him to go thinking she’d made a special effort for him either. His vanity, especially since the delectable (and so young) Catherine had moved in with him, was thriving quite well enough without her accidentally feeding it. It was no good asking Henry’s opinion, sweet and well-meaning as he was, he’d probably suggest an off-the-shoulder taffeta ballgown.

  As she applied the lipstick she took a quick look at him. He sat observing her make-up process, just like the best of girlfriends waiting for gossip, picking up perfume bottles and taking interested sniffs at them and pulling faces. He was a cosy friend, she thought, so comfortably shabby, always wearing oversized shirts of soft, huggable fabrics, just like nightdresses back in childhood. He smelt of hand-rolled tobacco and oil paint and his newly greying hair looked as if he’d so long ago given up combing it that it no longer knew in which direction it was supposed to go. There weren’t many people she’d feel so content to have draped over the bath edge while she got on with such personal going-out preparations.

  Among the inhabitants of the Crescent where conversation of more than ‘good morning’ and some communal tut-tutting about what dogs had left on the pavement was seen as an assault on precious privacy, Henry’s casual gregariousness was to be treasured. Unattached and uncommitted, he was always available for a drink, a grumble, a movie or a meal – no strings, no pay-offs required. The Perfect Man, Nina’s friend Sally called him. Too close to home, Nina retorted, and anyway she wasn’t looking.

  Nina finished with the lipstick, put it into her handbag and leaned across to kiss his forehead. Henry recoiled, fending her off, laughing. ‘You’ll leave a big red mark!’ he complained. ‘I’ll go all innocent into Mr Patel’s for a paper and the whole neighbourhood will know that I’m the sort of sad old sod who can only get women to kiss me on the head!’

  ‘OK then, no kiss, I promise,’ Nina told him, picking up her bag and giving her back view a quick look in the mirror. ‘By the way what was it you came round to borrow?’ she asked him as they went down the stairs. ‘Was it the stepladder, because if it was, I think you’ve already got it.’

  ‘Can’t remember,’ Henry shrugged as they reached the hallway. ‘No, I think, yes I’m sure it was the hedge trimmer thingy. I’ve had one of those notes from the Council; they’re threatening to confiscate my privet if I don’t stop it growing out over the pavement. Some small-minded sod in this miserable street must have reported me. They probably think it could put someone’s eye out. My old mother was always saying that. Was yours?’

  ‘Yes of course she was. They all were. There was that one and “If you pull that face and the wind changes.” Probably still says them, on a good day. I’ll have to ask Graham,’ Nina said as she opened the door. ‘The trimmer’s in the shed, just help yourself. Key’s in the padlock.’

  ‘Thanks. Have a good lunch.’ Henry strolled towards the side gate of the house and then looked back at her. ‘Tell Joe from me that I still think he’s mad. Oh, and run back upstairs and put the
other earrings on. With his monstrous ego those little gold notes will have him thinking you’re still hankering after the days when his so-called music filled the house. The street, even,’ he added.

  Nina hesitated on the doorstep as Henry disappeared round the corner towards the shed and the hedge trimmer. They’re only earrings, for heaven’s sake (only lunch, only Joe), she thought, hovering with her keys, waiting to feel ready to leave. Joe was hardly likely to sit there over his galette de tomates or whatever wondering about the secret psychology of her jewellery. That was the sort of thing that happened at the beginning of relationships, not the end of them. She slammed the door shut and marched down the path. Fronds of stray wistaria reached out from the arch over the gate and brushed against her face. Perhaps Henry would notice, Nina thought, and give them a bit of a neighbourly clipping in return for use of the hedge trimmer.

  Across the road, at number 26 (four bedrooms, late Victorian, period features) a man was attaching a SOLD sticker to the FOR SALE sign that had stood at the gatepost for only a couple of weeks. He looked up as Nina unlocked her car and whistled. She rewarded him with the full Pearl Girl power smile but he’d turned back to his hammering. Oh well, she thought.

  In the car on the way to the restaurant, Nina felt the familiar rising nervousness that came over her every time she and Joe had this monthly so-civilized lunch date. It was an on-the-way-to-the-dentist feeling, dread and excitement and the certainty that real life was on hold till it was all over. It didn’t have the same thrill as dating, but then it wouldn’t with an ex-husband, but it came unnervingly close. This one would be the tenth lunch, all in different restaurants, just, as Joe had decided, for the pleasurable hell of it. They’d now covered all the seasons and were back to spring again, which made her wonder if she should be feeling new-startish, skin sloughed like a gleaming snake. ‘The first Thursday of every month,’ he’d suggested when their so-amicable separation had been agreed. ‘Just you and me so we can talk about the girls and do all that family decision stuff without cutting into their time or having silly misunderstandings over the phone.’ He’d made it sound like a business meeting. She’d briefly imagined wearing a chalk-striped power suit and bringing along a file full of diary dates – doctors’, orthodontists’ and opticians’ appointments, formalized lists of Emily’s A-level grade predictions, what size Lucy’s shoes were this week.